The first thing I did after being "branded" was take my precious little shattered being on an adventure, scouring the internet like a spider monkey on a mission. I looked for anyone, I didn't care who, just a somebody with hot air that could give me some clue as to why I felt the way I did. I needed desperately to find a familiar soul who knew what I was going through, understood the pain, the shame, and the immediate need to end my life. I needed to know someone cared, accepted, recognized and appreciated the struggle I was facing. I found no one. For years I looked, without success. But, in some magnificently freakish moment, I finally found someone. She laid claim to a mended heart, a whole being, a life of value and worth, and she is speaking to you right now. I am her and I am that person you need. That person who cares, accepts, recognizes and appreciates your struggle. It's not a common struggle and unless a person walks in our shoes, they will never understand you the way I do. I don't promise to have all the answers, but I do promise to have all the unconditional love and support you need to find your life and learn to smile again.