The first thing I did after being "branded" was take my precious little shattered being on an adventure, scouring the internet like a spider monkey on a mission. I looked for anyone, I didn't care who, just a somebody with hot air that could give me some clue as to why I felt the way I did. I needed desperately to find a familiar soul who knew what I was going through, understood the pain, the shame, and the immediate need to end my life. I needed to know someone cared, accepted, recognized and appreciated the struggle I was facing. I found no one. For years I looked, without success. But, in some magnificently freakish moment, I finally found someone. She laid claim to a mended heart, a whole being, a life of value and worth, and she is speaking to you right now. I am her and I am that person you need. That person who cares, accepts, recognizes and appreciates your struggle. It's not a common struggle and unless a person walks in our shoes, they will never understand you the way I do. I don't promise to have all the answers, but I do promise to have all the unconditional love and support you need to find your life and learn to smile again.
You know this war of which I speak of, don't you? This internal war; a war that very few understand.
If you are here and you get it - you get my words and you feel those emotions - the unpleasant ones, rising up in your soul struggling just to be heard, then this is where you belong.
Hi, my name is Dana and I, too, am a Noncustodial Mom. It's been almost 11 years. I'd be lying if I say the struggle has dissipated, because in some ways it hasn't, but I have fought my way through to the other side where the sun shines brighter than ever! Now it's your turn, and I'm going to help.